No denying it...trying to celebrate it...I have been very active lately. Other than some headaches, and low-level fatigue, I have felt good. Almost...n-o-r-m-a-l. normal.
A few posts back, when I discussed my CPP Disability application, I mentioned that certain things have just become second nature to me (like guiding my leg into my pants, or holding on to the bathroom wall). So if I were to expand my thinking on this idea, I guess that I have made a number of other adjustments in my life, in order to get through the day...one day at a time. I'm not going to try and figure out what they are, but I imagine they involve body positioning, head movements and task selection.
So today, when my "wobbles" were activated while I was sitting by myself at the kitchen table, I was taken aback! I spent a very short amount of time sorting out papers from the junk drawer (remember, one of 3 junk drawers). I decided to use page protectors to organize and separate pizza flyers, coupons, restaurant menus...so I was dividing a big pile into multiple little piles. This involves a shifting of the eyes, a subtle turning of my head, moving my hand one direction while looking the opposite direction ... as Jason says...it was just enough to remind me that I am disabled.
In my mind, it reminded me that I am where I need to be. When I start to think, "well maybe I can get some kind of job...", I will remember that I can't sort papers.
P.S. As I'm typing this, I now remember walking the aisle of the video store the other day...I suddenly needed Jason by my side. I had been walking forward, with my head turned to the left...I KNOW BETTER THAN THAT! It was obviously a moment when I let my subconscious guard down!