still out

I think that the 10 count was called on me sometime ago...

I'm going to try and post in sections...type a bit, go away for a bit, type a bit...
Let's see how this goes.

I'm still down for the count. I can't get out of bed (or off the couch) without feeling wobbly/drunk/not centered/of exaggerated movements. Jason and I aren't sure what to attribute this to; however, we feel the need to attribute it to something.

Most importantly, we need to decide if this is a relapse for me. Tracking relapses is an important part of monitoring the disease. For myself, I would prefer to track relapses while on medication designed to decrease the severity and frequency of relapses...

It was today while eating lunch, that we discussed the possibility that this is what is happening to me. The irony is that it worsened after the tests on Monday. But I have also had severe migraines and headaches for the past couple of weeks. Headaches so out of the ordinary, that the head pain is reminiscent of the "big one" that kicked off my troubles in June 06.

(*I know migraines and headaches (especially my own), as I was diagnosed as suffering from migraines when I was 16)

I will say this, though, everyday I think that it will be better tomorrow. This has its pros and cons.

Pro: it keeps me going and somewhat cheery.
Con: it doesn't allow me to ask for help, because I just assume that I will get to it tomorrow

And then each pro and con has their own pros and cons!

Pro to the Pro: Jason doesn't worry as much
Con to the Pro: people may assume that it isn't that bad

Pro to the Con: uh oh, I can't think of one
Con to the Con: this upsets the people who want to help, and don't know what to do. And, I (and we) do need help

I need to lay down now,

Emily