a bit further into the present

Up until tonight, I have been doing pretty good at letting others do "the work" around the house (even letting someone else get my breakfast ready for me). However, tonight, I cleared up most of the dinner dishes. Why, would I do such at thing, you must be wondering. Well, at some point today, I told myself that feeling tired, uncomfortable, and somewhat in pain has had it's day. I feel that I am taking too long to feel better.

I wiped off the kitchen counter, pressing my belly button into the edge of the counter...ouch. Then I decided to put away some papers that had been laying out since Thursday, and upon scanning them, noticed that I'm not supposed to do lifting or housework type duties for one week!

hehehe. oops.

I have spent some time since my procedure on Thursday, wondering if I should post about the results that I was given that day. I often remind myself that other than the odd post, the purpose of this blog is to make people aware of MS. Of course, this includes myself. And really, does anything happen to me these days that isn't somehow related to, or effected by MS? I don't think so. For myself, having MS means that it is always present, and has to be considered when making any kind of decision. It's kind of like my shadow (except that it doesn't go away in the dark).

One thing that I remember reading when I was surrounding myself with tons of MS information, was that just because you have MS, doesn't mean that you won't get any other diseases. And along that same line, don't just assume that if you have a problem, it must be the MS.

So when I began to seriously notice painful feelings in my abdomen, in particular my bladder, I made the mistake of assuming that it was the MS...my brain sending mixed up signals to my bladder. Was I ever WRONG!

I found out on Thursday that I have what is considered, stage four endometriosis. Stage four is the classification given to the most "serious" level of endometriosis. My bladder and uterus have fused together, thanks to the amount of endometrial cell growth. This means that more surgery is in my near future - non-elective surgery, and more stressful than what I just had.

Endometriosis is one of the two major causes of infertility (I just happen to have both!). After coming to grips with having to put children on hold because of my MS (which only happened after three years of trying to get pregnant), I am again forced to think about my reproductive possibilities. Why can't I just deal with one problem at a time?

An even better question is: am I really dealing with all of my seemingly unfortunate realities? I'm not sure.

That's all for now,

Emily