This past Wednesday was week 3 of my MS fatigue workshop. We are halfway done, and I'm wondering what I have learned. One thing that I have learned, as I have already mentioned, is that I'm not alone, and I'm not crazy! Maybe that is enough right there.
I'll continue to think about this.
But let me tell you a story first (as I shared with my workshop)
Last week-end Jason and I packed up our car, and left on a 4 day getaway to Northern Ontario. We had the following for luggage: 2 pillows, one suitcase, one travel fridge (which plugs in to an outlet in the car), my laptop, and an "everything-but-the-kitchen-sink bag". We were set to stay in a hotel twice, and when we do that, we bring everything inside except for the pillows.
On our last morning out to the car, from the hotel, I had the keys to unlock the car, and pop the trunk hatch. I was rolling along with the suitcase, my laptop, and my purse. I stopped at the back door, and opened it for Jason so that he could put the fridge in, and hook it up. I made my way around to the trunk, and prepared to lift the suitcase in.
*along comes Jason, making a move towards the suitcase, to lift it in to the trunk.
*Emily walks to the side of the car, assuming she could sit in her seat
The fridge is not hooked up. It's sitting on the seat, not yet pushed to the center.
This frustrated me. I thought that we were being efficient...working as a team. I didn't think that we needed words - I assumed that Jason would do the fridge business, and I would load the trunk.
Jason had other thoughts - saving me spoons.
End of Story.
My workshop group thinks that I am crazy. I should be appreciative of having someone who will do all of the work. For the single women in the group, they only have themselves, and that can be physically tiring (please note, this is not my observation or commentary...this is what they mentioned).
For me, when I'm able to do something, I want to do it. There will be enough times when I am unable to do things, and will need and welcome help.
Does physical work/exertion deplete spoon count? Yes, it can. But at that time, I was choosing to spend that spoon.
Does having me run out of spoons (or run low) place more stress on Jason? Yes, it can.
So I have to think of my spoon supply on a daily basis...and be fair to myself and Jason. And maybe just do less work.