old hat/new hat

I'm feeling like an old hat at this injection stuff...not that I have other painless injections to base this on!

Yes, yesterday's injection went as smoothly as the first one. So this has prompted me to do some more thorough research into the dreaded side effects. I feel that it is still too early to think of myself as "one of the lucky ones" who doesn't experience any difficulties when starting Rebif. According to my research, the "yucky" stuff typically begins by the first few injections. The titration (.1ml compared to the full dose of .5ml) is designed to ease the "yuckies".

* * * * *

If you have been reading this blog for many months, you would know that back in July, I took on a client at work. Unfortunately for all involved, this job is still going on, and I periodically must think about it: make decisions, visit the site, and advocate for the client. Now, I am thisclose to stepping away from it. I recognize that the situation is not good for me at this time (it wasn't good for me 4 months ago either). So I need to try on a new hat: the hat of a person who has done all that she can do.

Emily

and we've begun

I have officially returned to drug treatment. After four and a half months off of drug, yesterday was my first "mini" dose of Rebif. I am on a titration schedule: 6 doses of at a lesser amount, and then into 22 micrograms. Depending on how well 22 micrograms goes, things may switch to 44 micrograms.

Yesterday was my best experience so far, when comparing approximately 210 previous injections. Jason and Corina were here for the training, and any potential drama. Much to Corina's surprise, Jason and I had previously elected her to administer my first dose. But the only drama was Corina, shaking while pinching up the skin on my arm...syringe in hand, cotton ball at the ready... and me encouraging, "It's ok. You can do it."

What I was really thinking was, "Anytime now... let's go...I'm waiting..."

And then I said, "Did you push the plunger?" I couldn't feel anything, and the room had fallen silent. I didn't even hear the dreaded ting of the needle as it was retracted.

"Yup, she's done."

I didn't notice the moment. And I didn't notice anything for the rest of the day. Well, that it isn't totally true. I had taken a tylenol prior to the injection, and spent the following eight hours on the couch, except for when I got up to get my dinner. It was then that I noticed a slight achiness in my arms. Compared to every Copaxone injection...that was nothing!

So now I have to wait until Monday for my next injection. It feels so strange. I can see how it might be easier to forget a dose on Rebif. On Copaxone, the injections were everyday, and I was often reminded of this by the lingering pain in the previous location. Not that I want to get ahead of myself...there is still plenty of opportunity for this to go sour. But so far, it feels good.

The other thing missing for me yesterday was the emotional reaction to having to go through this in the first place. There is plenty of time for that to come too, and I'm sure that it will come and go as all of the variables come into play (side effects, location of injection, overall physical and emotional condition that day, giving myself the injection when no one else is around etc).

I am surrounded by people who want to make this easy for me, no matter how difficult it is for them. I can count at least five people who would give me my injections: Jason the rock, Corina the conquerer, father-in-law Gil who will do anything that I need, Shaun-of-no-fear, and Ladyfingers (need I say more?). Unfortunately, the training session was only for Jason and one other person.

And with less injections...will they all get a turn?

Emily

first time is approaching

The "planned week" seems to be working out well for me. I am looking forward to a day "off" tomorrow. Jason and I have gone to the movies (Juno) with friends, and last night (pre-Valentine's) we went for dinner (somewhere new to us) and played 3 games of pool!

As I rest tomorrow, we will be visited by the training nurse...and I will have my first Rebif injection. The time has finally arrived. I received my Serono "welcome pack" by courier on Tuesday, and the training nurse phoned this afternoon to arrange the first injection.

So the Rebif welcome pack is just as "chock-full-o-goodies" as the Copaxone backpack was. I received a large messenger style bag, a frezzer pack, a travel case for the freezer pack and syringes (enough for one week), a journal, a Rebiject (auto injector) in a fancy hard carrying case, a needle clipper, and a syringe disposal case for travel.

The needle clipper is the cats meow if you are someone who requires home injections!

Emily

And the Rebiject has rubber grips that the Autoject didn't!